EPISODE 19: Eliana Felder

July 24, 2024

INTERVIEW BY PRIYANKA GERA

Photo by Ivan Dominguez

Edited by Amar Gopal

Where did you grow up?

I grew up in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. It’s where I lived until I left for college.

What’s one thing about Pittsburgh that you love?

I guess you could call it a suburban community. It’s not totally urban in the middle of nowhere even though people might think that. It's not fully a city either. You can just walk to everything that you need to get to; it's very convenient. Whenever I go home, I get very excited by it. I can just walk to the grocery store, walk to my haircut place, walk to Starbucks, and it's great. Especially coming from Westchester where you can't walk anywhere.

Are you going to be the first doctor in your family?

No, both my parents are doctors. My mom is an endocrinologist and my dad is an ENT. And his dad was also an ENT. So, it would make a really great story if I wanted to be an ENT, but after seeing the statistics yesterday, it looks like ENT is the most competitive it’s ever been. I'm happy to not be going into it. I just can't see myself passionate about the ear, nose, and throat.

Who else is in your family?

I have four siblings. I have one sister and three brothers. Two older siblings, a twin brother, and a younger brother..

You're a twin!?

Yeah. There are so many twins, especially in the Jewish community. It's insane. Like, we were at a Shabbat dinner last week. Six of us in a row were all twins! I'm an IVF twin.

So you are kind of in the middle?

I am kind of in the middle. Technically I am the middle child by two minutes. But both my twin and my older brother repeated a grade in preschool, so I kind of ended up just always feeling like the older sibling because I was in the same grade as my older brother, and my twin was in a lower grade. So, I probably had like older sibling vibes. Just always kind of thought I was in charge.

How was it growing up with three brothers?

I guess they would do “boy things” together, but it was more the age difference. My older two siblings would hang out together, or my twin and my older brother would hang out together. My sister was usually way too old, just doing older things than me, and I was just annoying her like wearing her clothing and… wearing her clothing. Also asking to hang out with her and her friends. But yeah, I feel like it was pretty even between girls and boys.

Why NYMC?

My dad went to New York Medical College, so that kind of made a nice story. He graduated in '89. I knew I wanted to stay in the New York area or the tri-state area. I really only applied to schools in that area. And I like that there is a strong Jewish community here. And my mother actually grew up in the Westchester area, so I have some family around here like my cousins, my aunt, and my grandparents. I was definitely scared to move to Westchester. I thought it was in the middle of nowhere. Turns out it’s a really nice place to live. I lived in the city for a few years before this, so it's been a really nice change.

So you mentioned living in the city before. What did you do before med school?

I went to college in Midtown at Yeshiva University or Stern College. I graduated in 2021 and then worked at a fertility practice in Manhattan for a bit more than a year. My title was Fertility Care Coordinator. So I worked with patients who were doing IVF cycles or egg freezing cycles to help plan and coordinate their cycles.

Do you think that's influencing what you want to do, reproductive endocrinology?

So, I was actually pre-dental in college. I was pre-dental all the way. It was really nice because I got to escape all of the toxic pre-med culture. I was like, 'Oh, that's not for me. I'm not one of you guys.' And then I bought my DAT books to study for the DAT, and then I was like, ‘No, I'm not about to put all this energy into studying for a test for a school,’ when I just didn't see myself being passionate about teeth.

I couldn’t get excited about it. When people asked me why I wanted to be an orthodontist, I was like, 'Oh, because I'm a perfectionist and I like straight teeth,' but that's really silly if you think about it. So then I was like, 'I think I'm going to do medicine because I like the idea of caring for the whole person.' So I wanted to be a psychiatrist when I applied to medical school.

And then after working at the fertility clinic, I was like, 'No, I want to do this. Be a reproductive endocrinologist.' It also makes a nice story because I am an IVF baby.

What's the last vacation you took?

Last summer I went to Hawaii, or Maui. I visited my uncle—my dad’s brother—who has a house there. My aunt was going to visit him and I was like, 'Oh, are you going to Hawaii? Oh, that’s so fun.' I tried to hint, and then it kind of worked. And so I got myself an invitation to Hawaii. I went with my aunt to visit her brother for a week and it was really pretty. I haven’t really traveled much this year. I haven’t really felt the need to.

What was a typical day in Hawaii?

Probably slept in. Me and my aunt, the one who lives in Maui, would wake up, have our coffee, and sit on our phones just staring out at the ocean, because it’s a house on the beach. We usually would go into the pool and then go somewhere for lunch, maybe just the mall. Do some sightseeing. Jeff Bezos has a house out there, so we went and stalked out his house for a bit [both laugh]. It’s on the edge of the island and has all these trespassing signs. It was interesting to see where a person like that lives.

We went to see Lahaina. It’s where there was a big Maui fire last year. It burned down this really old tree. We were there just three weeks before it all burned down. I think it’ll grow back. Trees grow from the bottom up so if the top of it burns off why won’t it just grow back? I don’t know. I don’t really know how trees work [both laugh].

What’s a hidden talent that you have?

I feel like most of my talents are not hidden. I mean they could be if you don't know me, My main talents are that I play three instruments. I played violin since I was two years old and then I later added on piano and harp. I feel like harp is the coolest, but violin is my favorite.

DId you have a mini violin as a kid?

They make violins really small. I think it's called a 1/32nd size. Yea, I have pictures. My whole family plays instruments. 

I don't play as much these days as I'd like to, but I feel like that's my main talent. I don't know if they’re hidden though.

So how’d the harp come about?

At my bat mitzvah, my mom hired a harpist to come play, and then I guess she liked it. So, then she was like, 'Okay, Eliana, now you will play the harp.' That’s how I remember the story going. First, I started with a lever harp, which is a small harp, and my harp teacher’s name was Gretchen. She was in the symphony. Gretchen and I had an interesting relationship. Then eventually, we bought a big pedal harp with a gold crown. My average week in high school had three individual music lessons and three hours of orchestra. I also had a student– I taught a little girl how to play the harp.

Do you have any pets?

Yeah, my family's a big cat family. It's a little bit embarrassing. Right now, at home in Pittsburgh, my family has four cats. We used to have a dog, a standard poodle, but she passed away a few months ago. So four cats. The oldest cat is my cat, Prince Charles. He's a white Himalayan Persian blue point. I got him for my ninth birthday present. So, he's currently 16 years old. He’s definitely on his 9th life. He has chronic sinusitis, weighs like seven pounds, but he's hanging in there. Then there's Jack, who we call Bean. There's Cosmo, who's currently been missing for the past 48 hours, but he'll probably come back. He just went on a little stroll. They always go and come back. If they don't come back fast enough, then my mom gets another cat to replace them [both laugh]. And that's how we have so many cats. And then there's Luna, who is Cosmo's mom. I can draw you a family tree if you want.

What's the worst fashion moment you've had?

I feel like I've had a lot of bad fashion moments. Most of my childhood and teenagehood was just one big bad fashion moment. One that comes to mind is I used to wear black leggings and crew black socks with white Vans. And I was wearing a skirt for modesty reasons. Black skirt, usually. My friends were really nice to me about it. They didn't make fun of me until after a while. That was kind of the style from the school I went to. It was a Jewish high school. and that was kind of just the style there. And then I got to my gap year program in Israel with different people. And I was like, I don't think this is something people wear. 

Another one is my bat mitzvah. I was wearing a black pencil skirt; a black three-quarter sleeve shirt, and a short sleeve beige shirt on top of that with frills. My hair was terrible, and I was wearing a green amusement park wristband in the pictures. Nobody thought to tell me to take that off. My sense of style has definitely evolved over the years.

Do you have any phobias?

I have a lot of phobias. When I was a kid, I developed an irrational phobia of tornadoes. I would get scared if there was one white cloud in the sky. I didn't even go to school some days because I went to work with my parents and hid under their desk, worried there might be a tornado. I got over it by becoming really obsessed with learning about wind indexes and checking the wind every day. Although Pittsburgh doesn't really get tornadoes, just the warning of one would terrify me.

I'm also pretty scared of bugs. If there's a spider, it's their room now. I am sleeping on the couch. If it's anything bigger than that, like a cockroach, I'm just done. I have a traumatic history with cockroaches in my shower when I lived in Manhattan.

How do you feel about apocalyptic movies?

I love apocalyptic movies. During COVID, my family and I watched all of them, like the Hunger Games and Divergent or the world ending from some mysterious disease. I think they're so interesting. It's not just natural disasters; often, it's people killing each other for some political reason. Right now, I'm watching Killing Eve with Sandra Oh. It's about a female assassin, and it's insane. I highly recommend it. It's scary but thought-provoking.

How would you survive a zombie apocalypse?

Let's be real, I probably would not. I'm pretty high maintenance. If I were hiding in a cave and no one was coming to hurt me, I could survive for a long time without food or water. But I'm not physically strong, so if there was any violence or need to protect myself, there'd be no hope for me. I just like having my things and being comfortable. I think I would just die of physical discomfort rather than from an actual threat.

What are you feeling grateful for today?

I feel really grateful to be in medical school. We're so privileged to be doing this. Many people want to be here, and we often take it for granted. It's pretty cool to have just finished second year and be going into third year. It’s scary, but I think you just have to do it to know that you can do it. I'm also grateful for the strong community here on campus; everyone is so supportive and nice.

What's a friendship deal breaker for you?
I am someone who really doesn’t hold a grudge. even though sometimes I feel I should. If someone has wronged me, my other friends will be like, why are you still friends with them? I think it's because I don't have the energy to focus on that negative energy. I'm a big introvert, so a lot of my friends end up having to work hard to be my friends. But it’s a good question. I think generally just not being a kind person. Obviously everyone has their nuances, but you shouldn’t just be pointlessly mean or judging other people. 

Are you into collecting anything?
I'm a bit of a hoarder. I collect clothes, keep all my birthday cards, and all my playbills. I have a playbill scrapbook from every show I've been to. The last show I saw was with my mom and dad on New Year's Eve; we were in Times Square, trying to get through the crowd to see the show. I also hoard food. If we were stuck in my apartment we could survive for a month with what’s in my pantry.

What's your favorite family holiday tradition?
Every Thanksgiving, we play a music concert together. My mom types up a program, and we all have to perform something. I usually play "Home for the Holidays" on the piano. My brother MC’s. It's something we've done every year.

What's your favorite dish for Thanksgiving?
I'm not a big fan of turkey; I think it's a chicken knockoff. I really like the brussel sprouts my dad makes with lemon and dijon mustard, and I love pecan pie. I get more excited about the sides than the turkey.

Words of advice to the current M1s?
Enjoy your summer and don't be scared that it's your last break. In M2, you'll find that there are more breaks than you expect. The year goes by really fast, and the material is much more interesting than in M1. Prepare yourself for cardiac physiology the first week of M2—it's challenging but it's all downhill from there.

Contact Alexandra at efelder@student.touro.edu.

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