Episode 1: A Helping Hand

May 9, 2018

I have always been a single mom, I raised my four children by myself. I’ve worked for the government- as a child care provider, I used to take care of 13 children just so I can pay my bills. I am good at it. I am good at nurturing kids. I have been raising kids my whole life, it started out with small kids, to now big kids that I work with at Lessing’s (ha!). I have worked in the church, I have worked with the community. I just love people. Even though I have a degree in management accounting, I love working with people. It brings me so much joy.

I really love my job here. I know a lot of people in the world don’t love their work, but I love working at NYMC and at Lessing’s. My boss says you are not normal because I love my job. I love my job because I get to meet new people, learn from different cultures, and different perspectives and take care of people. And it feels good to be there for people who needs someone. I thank god for being able to be there for people in their moments of need, because life is hard, and everyone needs help.
And to that end, I think everyone should be treated with kindness, and openness.

I think a lot of people assume that medical students come from money, with their silver spoons and or are all the same. I know that that's not the case. Each student has their own unique struggles and their own story.
Over the years working here, I have spoken to so many students, it’s an honor to meet you all! Everyone has their own amazing lives. And to see them go such a long way: first year, second year, third year, fourth year. To see all of you struggle and yet thrive. I am so proud of all of you.

I look at the café, like a “home away from home”. Even though students may only get an hour break. Rushing from place to place. I want to help them relax, and I want to remind students that they will be fine. In a way, I see all the students as my children. If I can make even a slight difference on students’ lives for the better, that means the world to me.

Let me see, during my first year here, I remember meeting a group of students. They were new to the school and the area, and had nowhere to go for thanksgiving, so I invited them to my house and made so much food: Spanish food, American food, to feed them and give them a home away from home. It felt so good!

Then there was that time, when my boss gave me a gift card as a Christmas bonus to a grocery store. My neighbors are much less fortunate than I, so I bought all these groceries and tried to give it to them. I know people can be embarrassed to take free food, to accept help. But there’s no shame in being that: in being human. There’s no shame in needing help. I told my neighbor to come over for dinner, but told a white lie that not everyone who was invited came (even though in truth, I only invited them), and that they were doing me a favor by taking home all of the left-over food. On Holidays, no one should be alone, or not have anything to eat. It’s what I believe.

At my house I have pictures of all the children of students that have been sent to me. I have all the gifts that students have given me every now and then. I always wonder how they are doing. Always wishing them the best, wherever they may be in the world. And when students come back to visit me, as residents, doctors, it brings me so much joy.

I remember when this one student came to visit me. I just started crying. When he started here, he was diagnosed with a life threatening disease. He almost lost his life.
He would always buy his lunch here, like any of you and I would ring him up. Ask him how he was doing. Some days he would be ok, other days he would not be feeling well. I would remind him to take care of himself. When he was diagnosed with that life threatening disease, I was so scared for him, so worried.

I was so moved that he got through all of it. All the hard work, all of the things that I see students do on a daily basis, to achieve his dream, to become this amazing doctor. To have had the privilege to watch him grow, it is such a priceless gift. When he told me that he came back because he wanted to see me. I couldn’t stop crying.

We get so distracted in our lives, and at times we take each other for granted, and the time we have together is so important. When we let go of the special bond that we maintain with the people around us, I think that’s when we lose our way.

And so we all need a reminder sometimes. From others. To believe in ourselves. That’s why NYMC is special, it’s like a family here. Here, we all have someone who believes in all those positive qualities that sometimes we forget about ourselves. And because I know how busy students are, I try to give them that. I try to affirm how amazing they are.

Before Lessing’s took over at NYMC, my work situation here was really tough. I had trouble with my hip and I was unable to take days off. It got so painful.
I feel so blessed to work for Lessing’s. My boss is amazing, and cares about me as a person. So I was finally able to take time that I need to rest.
But, last year, I woke up one day in unbearable pain. I couldn’t walk, I was in so much pain, I was crying. I had just started at Lessing’s, I didn’t have insurance, or good finances. I was scared.
The pain was so intense, I didn’t know which direction life would go, physically or mentally. I have never experienced anything like that. I was so scared. I had just started this new job, and was glad to have the opportunity to work.

I called my boss, and was crying so much.
He told me to take a deep breath, and go to the doctor, and take it from there. He told me to not worry about work. That meant the world for me.
I call the doctor and they call me to come in. I took X-rays. And I was crying the whole time because of the pain.
They said that I suffer from osteoarthritis, and that I had no cartilage in my hip- bone rubbing on bone. They told me that I needed surgery. I was terrified.

There is a student at NYMC that I am close with, and I guess she noticed that I wasn’t in that day. I was surprised when I saw her number on my phone at the doctors.
She said: "Yvette, why are you not at work? What’s wrong?"
I just started to cry:
she said “What’s wrong? Why are you crying?
I told her that I was in so much pain. That, I couldn’t move, or walk. That I was worried about my life, and whether I could afford treatments that may or may not work.
She said: “You are always giving us so much positive energy, it breaks my heart to hear you like this
She just told me to take care of myself, and that she would be there for me. I was so appreciative that she reached out to me, at one of my lowest moments. It meant so much to me.

Later, I found out that this student had taken up to herself to go to this school, and asked to organize a GoFundMe for my medical bills.
I was so lost for words.
I was crying, within 4-5 days so much money was collected for me. Students from all over the world, all ages, all backgrounds.
Current students, alumni, people from the NYMC community. I felt so lost for words.
There were so many tears. These were finally happy tears. I was so moved by the love I was receiving. It was the love that I give to people! How blissful it is to feel it come back at you!
I could have lost my apartment. But the money helped me take care of myself, and come back to work.
It is an honor to be here, at this school.

I remember reading through the comments that people were leaving, the well wishes they had left me.
You know why they meant so much?
Because I know that they came from the heart. When something comes earnestly from the heart, you can just tell, you can feel it.
I am who I am because I try my best to live a life based on what I believe.
I treat everyone with kindness. And believe in kindness.